10 Questions Never to Ask an Ultra Runner

1. How far do you run?

Doink! Didn’t you hear me when I said the words ultra and runner? Sorry but 26.2 is only a warm up.

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2. What pace do you run?

Oh good lord...pace!?! What is that? I just need to FINISH!

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3. How many toes nails do you have?

I lost count after 10.

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4. Ever heard of a car?

Gee, thanks, Einstein!

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5. What do you do about bodily functions while running distance?

Take it on the GO!

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6. You must really like running?

Umm…I accept that ultras are about suffering and perseverance.

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7. How far is your 50k marathon?

You got me there.

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8. How do you run a 100 miles?

How do you eat an elephant?

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9. Do you run the whole thing?

Now you’re channeling your inner stupid.

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10. Have you ever gotten lost?

Ah! Last but not the least…it ain’t a trail run if you didn’t get lost.

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Author: Shalini Kovach is the lead organizer of Terrain Trail Runners.